The Holidays

My coaching clients come in or should come in to develop more confidence when facing life’s milestone events. They come at those moments of pain, perhaps when planning a a family holiday reunion, a wedding, a graduation, confirmation, anniversary, or 30ieth birthday. In fact that is why I became the first Psychological Event Planner. I noticed that so many people planning such events suffer tremendous angst in the process. Why are so many happy milestones leading so many people to “lose it” when they should be experiencing the joy of letting go, moving forward and celebrating with their community of significant others. If it takes a village — it best not be a village of idiots: jealous parents who never moved on from their own divorce or
other grudge holders who make it all about them and leave you feeling or acting like the village idiot. I found I can help people at these crucial times to develop life-giving life strategies for dealing with the first ever reuniting of their divorced parents, for example. Perhaps they are facing a Monster In Law as played by Jane Fonda, peeved at losing her special only child to the not good enough daughter in law. In that movie she had never learned how to deal with loss and is forced to face her perfect storm: losing her son, her youthful body, and her job as a famous host of her own television show. But not everyone gets it that these moments of transition and loss are the time to seek help. The American way is to procrastinate. My plea to all thee who
delay: Procrastinate Later!

You may download the full paper as a PDF

Your parent’s or mine for the Holidays: The first post honeymoon decision!

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“In the last analysis, our only freedom is the freedom to discipline ourselves.”

Bernard Baruch


  • Shel J. Miller, Ph.D.

    About Shel
    I build relationships - relationships that restore joy and meaning. My clients and I focus on their relationship strengths, on what's strong rather than what's wrong. I am a psychologist coach capable of effective, efficient transforming of conflict whether it emerged from the bedroom or the boardroom. Thus I offer executive, family, marriage and divorce coaching in order to provide solutions to personal or business conflicts.

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