Relationship Coaching

Perhaps the most famous face to face coach, (some would say “in your face”), confronting high conflict couples and families is Dr. Phil. Many arrive to the first few coaching sessions with a report of a breakdown in ability to communicate, and a loss of a sense of humor. I know that it will be important to not only stimulate new awareness and
accountability but to inject a few laughs as well. What I also know is that it may take a long time for people to let go of their early learned and deeply ingrained loyalty to the images and voices of one’s extended family. So no matter how much time one may spend practicing new styles or modes of communicating, and laughing about one’s flaws, the bottom line is to give oneself permission to face fear — to move on into an uncertain future. Growing up means listening to one’s own voice and creating one’s own image of relating while the competing voices and images of our models pop up and derail our best intentions. We “can’t communicate” usually translates to I am having trouble communicating with my own self and “I don’t want to know it.”

You may download the full paper as a PDF

The H.A.R.D. Reality of Relationship Coaching©

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“Worry is like interest paid in advance on a debt that never comes due.”

David Mamet


 The Spanish Prisoner
  • Shel J. Miller, Ph.D.

    About Shel
    I build relationships - relationships that restore joy and meaning. My clients and I focus on their relationship strengths, on what's strong rather than what's wrong. I am a psychologist coach capable of effective, efficient transforming of conflict whether it emerged from the bedroom or the boardroom. Thus I offer executive, family, marriage and divorce coaching in order to provide solutions to personal or business conflicts.

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